My parents are abusing me physically
Please tell me what to do am really ambitious with y life and want to shine in future but these parents are beating me like am a soft toy and this happens thrice in a week.
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As salaam alaykum, Peace be upon you. This is a prayer and a wish but it is also a right. Each of us has the right to peace and physical safety and when that right is taken away from us or we are the subject of oppressive force, it is incumbent upon us to stand up for those rights. Islam is not only a peaceful religion, but as Muslims we are directed to strive for peace and be in a state of peace, as this is what comes from being in a state, an inner state, of Islam. Therefore in order to be Muslim (literally: one who achieves peace by submitting to God) we have to protect and maintain the peace and safety of others and for ourselves. And we have to actively do something about cultivating these circumstances if it is within our ability. Nobody is sanctioned to take away your right to peace and safety from you, not even your parents.
It is wonderful, like you said, that you are ambitious and want to shine in your life. The ability and motivation to do that was put in you by Allah. It is a ni’ma (gift) and an amana (trust), meaning that you have a responsibility to nurture that ambition and shine and make sure that you bring it forth so that the world can benefit from it. There will continually be obstacles in your way to test you along the way, including your parents. While we are told to honor and respect our parents and to “show them our best”, we are not commanded to allow for them to oppress us or get in the way of fulfilling our obligations to Allah. This means that you do not have to, nor should you, put up with or tolerate physical abuse from your parents.
If you do not feel physically safe then you need to pursue your right to peace and safety. This primarily should be about ensuring that your parents are not allowed to beat you. It does not have to mean that you disrespect them or speak against them. You can show your parents your best by standing up for the truth and taking care of yourself. Find people around you that can support you in this effort and help to protect your physical safety. If you have a family member that you feel you can trust who will be able to mediate both sides and will prioritize your physical safety, then speak to them privately and come up with a plan of how to protect your physical safety while you work towards getting help with the situation, perhaps with family therapy. But the thing that needs to happen first and foremost is that you physically remove yourself from the situation to ensure your safety. This needs to be the priority. If you do not have a family member to help, reach out to a friend or community member. Here are some resources for you that you can use to help you devise a plan of action in pursuing your safety:
https://www.dfps.state.tx.us/Youth_Hotline/
http://www.childhelp.org/hotline/
https://www.childwelfare.gov/organizations/?CWIGFunctionsaction=rols:main.dspList&rolType=custom&rs_id=5
Praying for your strength and for ease in your situation
Sincerely,
Your brother in Islam,
‘Fatima Y’
