Spiraling thoughts

Assalamualaikum dear Sister!!

It sounds like you’ve been carrying an overwhelming amount of emotional pain, loneliness, and mental exhaustion for a long time. When thoughts are constantly spiraling and you feel misunderstood by the people around you, it can become incredibly draining. As I read your words, I can hear how exhausted you are not just physically, but emotionally and mentally. It sounds like you’ve been fighting a battle inside your mind for a long time, carrying anxiety, overthinking, self-doubt, family stress, and loneliness, often without feeling truly understood by the people around you.

What stands out to me is how deeply you are longing to be understood, accepted, and emotionally safe with someone. Many people hope to find a person who can immediately understand their inner world, especially when they have been holding so much inside for so long. When that connection doesn’t come easily, it can feel disappointing and isolating. When your chest feels tight and your thoughts race, remember that Allah invites you to turn to Him, not because He needs your du’a, but because you need His closeness.”Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.” (Qur’an 13:28)That rest may not come all at once. Sometimes it comes one breath, one sajdah, one tear, one sincere du’a at a time.


I also hear you saying that when you say, “I want to die,” what you’re really expressing is a desire for relief from the emotional pain and relentless thoughts. Even so, those thoughts are important to pay attention to. When they become intense, please reach out to a trusted person or a crisis support service in your area for additional support.

Allah says:
“Indeed, with hardship comes ease. Indeed, with hardship comes ease.” (Qur’an 94:5–6)
Notice that Allah repeats this promise!! The hardship may feel constant today, but He reminds us that ease accompanies it, even if we cannot yet see it.


Regarding therapy, it makes sense that opening up to someone new feels uncomfortable. Building trust takes time, and many people find the first sessions awkward or difficult. Feeling uncomfortable with a therapist doesn’t mean therapy won’t work for you it may simply mean that the relationship and trust need more time to develop, or that you haven’t yet found the right therapist for your needs. Many people assume they should feel comfortable right away, but trust is often built gradually. The first sessions can feel awkward, vulnerable, or even disappointing. Opening up to a stranger about your deepest struggles is not easy. The discomfort you felt does not mean therapy isn’t for you. It may mean that trust takes time for you, especially if you’ve spent years feeling misunderstood.


Also want to acknowledge the pain you experience in your relationship with your mother. Family relationships can have a profound impact on our emotional well-being, especially when there is ongoing conflict or when we don’t feel understood within our own home. When home does not feel emotionally safe, it can leave us feeling as though we have nowhere to rest from the stress.And your statement about wanting a deep hug.,That tells me there is a part of you that is yearning for comfort, reassurance, and human connection. Sometimes beneath anxiety and overthinking is a person who is simply tired of carrying everything alone.


For now, I want to acknowledge the courage it took to express all of this. You do not have to carry these feelings alone. Your pain is real, your need for support is understandable, and you deserve a space where you can be heard without judgment.For this moment, I want to remind you of something important: your feelings make sense in the context of what you’ve been experiencing. You are not crazy.You are a person who is struggling, hurting, and looking for relief. Those are very different things.You do not have to solve everything today. 
You may already know that hardship can sometimes make us feel distant from ourselves, others, and even from the peace we are searching for. Yet your reaching out, expressing your pain, and continuing to look for support are signs that there is still a part of you holding on to hope, even if it feels very small right now.

May Allah  replace your anxiety with tranquility, your loneliness with righteous companionship, your tears with relief, and your heaviness with sakīnah. May He open doors to people who listen with compassion, protect your heart from despair, and remind you every day that you are never alone.  Aameen!!


Warm regards,

 From your Sister in Islam,

“Fatima MV”